Secrets....

Tonight I learned from my parents (my Dear Old Dad and beloved stepMom) that DHS is looking for permanent homes for my two sons.

I cannot reconcile this with the fact that DHS does NOT consider me to be an abusive parent, proof being that I am allowed to visit my sons four times a week, for at least two hours at a time (vs. the one hour per week that most families get when DHS removes their children), and that I am allowed to take my sons anywhere I choose, as long as I have them home by the end of our visits.

I am trying to tell myself that it is only a "just in case" measure, the seeking of permanent homes....

... but honestly, I feel like DHS has already thrown in the towel where I am concerned...

... and I am devastated.

I have already been feeling like people are keeping secrets from me.

This only confirms that feeling.

sMom tells me that I probably need my medication increased. She's probably right.

Perhaps then this won't hurt so much....